As if you couldn’t tell, I’m having a hard time keeping up with my responsibilities here at Get Fit Slowly. I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about the site lately–trying to figure out what the problem is and why I’m having such a difficult time writing for it. This post is mostly a brainstorming session. I thought I’d just try and get some things down for two reasons. First, I hope that just by typing, I’ll be able to stimulate some creative juices that will get me motivated to write better pieces–for you and for me. Secondly, by putting my thoughts down on the screen, I’m hoping to identify the root of the problem so that I can fix it.
The Site In General
Ever since we got hacked (3 times at least) we’ve lost traffic, readership, and ad revenue. But most importantly the hackers took my mojo. I don’t know enough about the hacking process to understand it at all. I don’t know if they are random attacks or if we were specifically targeted. I don’t know if the malicious code that was inserted into our sites was inserted automatically by a web-bot or by an actual person. I don’t know if the intent is to steal traffic, ad money, or just piss us off. In any case it doesn’t matter what the reason was, I just know how it has affected me. It has left me totally unmotivated to keep up with the site.
I don’t like the way the site looks now either. I think it’s clunky, and impersonal. It’s hard to navigate and there are almost no personal touches like on the old design. I could probably figure out how to get the old template back, with the new security improvements, but I don’t particularly enjoy wading through wordpress code making tweaks by trial and error. So here I sit.
Getting My Mind Fit
Believe it or not, this time away from the site has actually been pretty good for my mind. I’ve been spending a lot of time with my family. We’ve been limiting our social engagements a bit and hanging out at home a lot. We’ve also been going to parks and playing outside and watching the development of our landscaping project at home. This past weekend, I was able to actually start (AND FINISH) a home improvement project that involved a lot of manual labor. By the end of the weekend, I was sore and tired, and had a tremendous sense of accomplishment. It was awesome. Mentally, I’m in a pretty good spot. My wife is back on track with her running, which makes our relationship better despite her time away from the family. When she’s with us, she’s really with us, and it’s very nice to have the old Pam back. So things are pretty good.
The State Of My Body
My weight is up a few pounds from my low of 178. This morning I was 181. The numbers don’t really bother me that much, which says a lot to me. The number used to be the only thing that mattered. I would do anything to get that number lower. I’m not eating perfectly, and I’m not exercising enough. But the old Mac wouldn’t have even come close to recognizing this fact for another year. Then he’d be so depressed about how much progress he’d wasted that he wouldn’t do anything about it for another two years. The new Mac recognizes the problem and gets back on track. Hopefully the future Mac won’t ever get off track!
Regarding my exercise habits, the last month has either been totally on (exercising every day) or totally off (not exercising at all). This week, I’ve done nothing while last week I ran 30 miles. The week before, nothing and the week before that 28 miles. So I’ve had two of my highest mileage weeks ever in the last month, but also two weeks of nothing. I need to find a balance.
My Plan
I haven’t really formulated my plan yet. It’s a work in progress, just like my diet, exercise, and this website. I’ve decided that it’s time to fix my diet and exercise problems–and that they definitely take priority over the writing and web design problems. I’d like to work on them all. However, I’m kind of at a point where there are so many unfinished projects on my plate that I need to get a few checked off so that my plate doesn’t weigh me down so much.
So now you know where I’m at. I’ll let you know where I’m going when I get there.
{ 13 comments… read them below or add one }
I seem to recall that both you and JD ran into a serious wall about this time last year also. I can’t think of the right metaphor for this, but your cycles of enthusiasm and discouragement, motivation and exhaustion have a certain rhythm to them that it would probably pay to do some thinking about.
You have effective tools to turn this around. You know what succesful behavior looks and feels like. I have no doubt that the barriers that are keeping you from doing what you already know works are real. “The hackers stole my mojo” is a barrier. It’s real. (Are you really going to let those motherf-ers take it from you, though?)
You never responded to my last suggestion, but I really wish you would try it. It was to use JD as an accountability buddy. Formulate a plan; call JD every night to discuss how the plan worked, and if it didn’t work, what change you need to make tomorrow in order to take a step forward toward your outcome. It’s a ten minute call: five minutes for you, five minutes for him. If you’re really serious, make it a three-way call with Lauren Muney.
You don’t need to reinvent the wheel here, Mac. You already know what works.
Thanks Greenman. I know I don’t have to reinvent the wheel. I actually haven’t even emailed JD in a while, so maybe chatting with him will kick start us both.
Life is crazy. Between a career that is going well and having two young kids that are maturing quickly I feel like I can’t keep up sometimes. Too many balls in the air. What I do know is that I need to be strong to be useful, so take take the time to work out mentally and physically. I also know I really enjoy this site. I frequent many websites related to fitness, but I am drawn to this one. It’s very real and motivating as a result. Sure you’re not doing work out of the days or providing videos, but what you do provide is far better. It’s a community of real people trying to stay fit while wading through the spontaneous nature of life. Regarding the hacking of the site. It makes me think of a quote by Vince Lombardi- It not how many times you get knocked down, it’s whether you get up. Keep doing what you do. It’s appreciated.
Just to be clear, Mac, I’m not suggesting that you merely chat with JD. I’m suggesting that you call him every night at 8pm for the next two weeks. In that call, you cover three topics: whether you exercised that day; if not, why not; and what change you need to make in order to exercise the following day. He does the same. It’s not a social call. The idea isn’t to kickstart anything; the idea is to overcome your own resistance by being held accountable by someone whose support is valuable to you. You can reinforce it by involving Lauren. You can reinforce it further still by blogging about it daily. You can reinforce it even more strongly by betting $500 that you’ll lose ten pounds in the next ten weeks — if you lose, you donate the money to the political party you hate. (Give the check to Pam to hold: she’ll tear it up if you make your goal). Involve your marathon-training partner.
You’re a family man. You feel daily the responsibility and reward of coming through for the people who depend on you. Committment and keeping your promises are obviously important to you. These qualities are part of who you are as a person. Harness their power to your own advantage. The landscaping project can wait (I almost wrote “weight”). Redesigning the website can wait. Let’s make a date to talk about those things again in ten weeks, shall we?
I think these slumps happen to us all but like Greenman I think it is a question of taking action rather than hoping you’ll just find your mojo again.
Sign up for a race again!! You were amazing when you had a concrete goal and a plan!
We all have setbacks. Good for you for sharing with all of us. I know you will get back on track, and off again – as we all do!!
Sending best wishes.
Re: hacking. It’s very unlikely you were specifically targeted. You probably had an old version of your blogging software running with an unpatched security hole that an automated scanning program detected. Most of these things are completely automated. If you keep everything up to date it probably won’t happen again.
Re: the rest. It just sounds like you’re starting down the path of burn out. Give yourself a break and cut yourself some slack. Also, it’s probably not necessary to write an essay every time you post. Write something short and fun to get the momentum going.
But please keep going. It helps me to read about other average guys going through the same ups and downs. We’re all in the same boat…
What came to mind as I read your post is the idea of ‘Progress, not perfection.’ Almost every time I see you put up a post like this it sounds to me like you’re trying to do this perfectly. But really what matters is that you make progress, not that you get it all “right”. And you are making progress! The sooner we realize we’ve had a setback, the sooner we can do something about it.
website and blogging slumps happen to all. I agree that action after a mental break can be a good way to recover your mojo. Take a break, then act.
I do have to say, I’m not as big a fan of this design as the last site design. Just one man’s opinion, but I also know you have to put your time where you can.
I have really struggled with this exact situation (less the being hacked) for the last 6 months. I burned myself out last fall and have been in the biggest writing slump of my life for the last 6 months. I also have very similar pitfalls with fitness as you and J.D., as well as a similar propensity toward depression as J.D. has expressed. And in fact, I feel as though the slump has carried over not just in fitness and writing, but a lot of other personal things.
My point? Even in these slumps I find your story highly encouraging, inspirational, and mostly: REAL. It helps me to know that I’m not the only one in this situation, clearly. I know others have faced this recently as well (Glen at LifeDev.net went through it too). You guys are not alone in this, and you are making a difference for many, many of us.
And for me, things are starting to turn around. I took a significant break which helped somewhat (though not as much as I’d hoped). But most importantly I’ve decided to take action. I have committed to carving out time to read just 5 other blogs per day as a means of inspiration (this is 1). I’ve also decided to try to meditate for just 5 minutes a day to try to quiet my mind a bit and find that “inner writer voice” that eluded me for a while. I’m also starting back on the fitness trail with exercising just 2 times a week as “baby steps” to a more serious fitness plan. You get the idea.
I say start small, as other commentors have mentioned. It’s what I’m doing; and hopefully, on my site and in comments here, I’ll keep you posted.
Update to previous comment: Sorry Glen. Typo – meant LifeDev.Net.
hmmm I noticed that my feed for your site had been REALLY quiet lately. The last thing that arrived in my reader’s inbox was dated May 20.. so I suspect some of your low traffic is because your feed is broken!
Unfortunately I have now exhausted my diagnostic skillz.
I’m sorry you’re in a lull but I hope you get your groove back! And that is a large number of positives you’ve got up there.